


I can't trust myself with my 3 AM shadow

by sheawaldenbecks (styleztomlinson)



Category: Eyewitness (US TV)
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-13
Updated: 2016-11-13
Packaged: 2018-08-30 16:18:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8539906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/styleztomlinson/pseuds/sheawaldenbecks
Summary: Yeah, Tivoli could be stifling, alright.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't been able to write in so long, and then Eyewitness came along, and well. Here we are. My best friend and my biggest support wanted something written and it turned into this. This is for you, [MC](http://hale-stilinski.tumblr.com). I love you. 
> 
> This is unbeta'ed, and any mistakes are my own. The title is from Talk Me Down by Troye Sivan.

Coming back from New York to Tivoli was like a rude awakening. The night skyline had felt almost protective, in a way, like he was safe to be Rick Anderton for a night, to do whatever he wanted.

To maybe be a little bit more like himself, if only for a night.

Kissing Philip in public hadn’t been his plan, not really. He’d just seen all the other couples at and around the bar kissing. Being free. It felt like anything was possible right in that moment, and so he did the one thing he wanted most.

It’s almost comical how different it is to be back. Driving down the streets of his home town and yet feeling so out of place. He missed the weight of Philip’s weight against his back on the cross, which he so quickly had become familiar with. He’d wanted to reach out for him, touch him, kiss him, anything. But the Tivoli air had been stifling, and he’d surrendered to the voice in his head telling him not to, to leave instead, despite every bone in his body telling him not to.

Now, he lay on his bed, fiddling with his phone in his hands. After everything that had happened, they’d started texting each other when the other got home more and more, like an unspoken agreement. _I just want to know you’re safe._

Lukas opened the Messages app on his phone, pressing his way to his and Philip’s messages. He was nothing more than a _P_ in his contacts. He’d had him under his name at first, but he’d been terrified that his dad would see him receiving messages from him and felt forced to change it. It felt wrong, to try and capture someone as ineffable as Philip in a single letter, but the overwhelming fear that his father would confiscate his phone and see him texting him- well. Fear was overpowering, sometimes. And sometimes giving in was the only option you had.

 _Hey_ , he typed, and hit send before he could regret it. The read receipt appeared instantaneously. His fingers flew over the screen as he typed, and then deleted and typed all over again, before deleting it once more.

 ~~I got home sa~~ -

 ~~New York was~~ -

 ~~Do you~~ -

 ~~I miss y~~ -

 _Home now_.

He hit send before he lost control of his hands, before his fingers betrayed him and he typed something else. Something dangerously close to _I miss you and I don’t want to be alone._ Something dangerously close to the truth.

He turned around on his bed, staring out the window into the grey of the Monday afternoon.

Yeah, Tivoli could be stifling, alright.

**Author's Note:**

> Hiii. Thank you so much for reading! Any kind of feedback brightens my day and means the world to me, in case you feel like it. I'm [styleztomlinson](http://styleztomlinson.tumblr.com) on Tumblr, if you want to stop by and say hi. Have a nice day!


End file.
